Social media: Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for example (at least the ones I troll around on) are breeding grounds for “the grass is always greener on the other side’s” thoughts and feelings that end up running through your head. (My husband kind of came up with this, so I can’t take full credit for the idea, but I’ll expand on it).
The internet is a great place for validation, but with that comes frustration, hurting feelings unintentionally and can bring up emotions that can make you feel crappy about what’s happening in your life.
I try to be a positive person, and I have not always been that way. So I keep things positive, and maybe making a status update is almost like making an “affirmation” and hoping for awesomeness to happen.
At least three times a day, well at least over this past winter that is NEVER ENDING, I get anxious and depressed, and sometimes even cry. I look at status updates and photos of people doing things in tropical locations that look fun, and I get envious that right now it’s cold in New York City, and obsess over certain things I have no control over.
With this also comes the self-doubt with career stuff.
So tonight I came home from my “night job” (yes some writers have night jobs), and my husband showed me this amazing audio/visual piece that Ira Glass, from This American Life, came up with.
Really, it’s worth a listen.
So I keep on trying and doing…it’s going well. It’s an on-going process. No one, and nothing is an overnight success, it takes years.
If you want to be on This American Life (I’ve submitted to them several times) you’re lucky to hear back if you pitch them…but that’s half of the battle…the other half is having an interesting enough topic that will make it past the editors of the show. Something with a chance that has been referred to as “being struck by lighting”.
I was interviewed for them, the story didn’t make the cut-for various reasons-but I made it past the halfway point, because I have kept trying.
I had a book deal that fell through six years ago. It was deemed to be “unsellable”, again for various reasons. So I took a few months and cried about it. Then I went out on a limb, and found a new literary agent that helped me start a project, and helped see me through it. It’s in progress, and it has been long and very enjoyable, but it is not easy.
I had an awesome interview lined up, it fell through for NOW…but it’s not dead in the water and I won’t stop trying.
I think what I’ve finally come to learn is that things aren’t handed to you on a plate, it takes hard work, trying, and trying and trying again…just like Ira Glass says in that video.
What I didn’t status update about today? The chicken special at work made me feel sick, and I threw up, had explosive diarrhea, came home early from work with a headache and cried. (Yeah that’s TMI, but you know what, EVERYONE has had diarrhea at least at one point in their lives) So, yeah. The grass wasn’t that green when I was in the toilet.
But I’m never going to stop trying and neither should you. Also, be wary of “new” specials at work…and seriously check out the Ira Glass link.