Product Review: Easy Feet…Good Product…Lame Blog Entry…

Well I got sucked into another “As seen on TV” product.  I couldn’t bother picking up the phone or going online to order Easy Feet, but it looked so…well EASY that I picked one up when I saw they had them at Walgreens.  It was CHEAPER there and I didn’t have to pay shipping and handling.

This product is simple and good.  You just suction cup stick it to your bathtub/shower and stick your foot in it, pour some soap on it, and move your foot and toes around.  There’s a pumice stone you can use on it as well.

That’s really all it does.  It’s not fancy.  I would elaborate on it more, but it’s pretty much self-explanatory.  It’s EASY and great to use for your FEET…hence the name: EASY FEET.

That’s it.  Nothing bad to say.  I got mine in blue, but kind of wish I would’ve gotten it in pink or yellow…but that doesn’t really matter now does it.  What’s done is done.  No, Easy Feet is not paying me to say this at all.  I just needed something to blog about this weekend, but if someone from their company sees this and wants to send me a pink or yellow one, please contact me.

I give Easy Feet an A+, I give this blog entry a B for BORING…I’m sure this review will be helpful to someone out there.

Now, I’m off to wash my feet!

Lingerie Do’s and Don’ts…Inspired by a Tuesday Night at Ricks…

Every Tuesday at the club we feature “Lingerie Night”.  I’m encouraging each and every one of you to come by the club and check it out.  It’s great…we have drink specials, and there are many lovely women for you to look at (I am fully dressed…sorry…but I still look cute.


Lingerie Tuesday has been a very interesting fashion learning experience for me.  Realize that in this blog, I am expressing my opinion, but in speaking to some others about the following, the majority have agreed.

Ladies, take what you will with my advice….Men, I know that some of you really do not care about lingerie, and some of you may have fetishes and be into some of this…with that said…here we go…

DISCLAIMER: These models do NOT work at Rick’s Cabaret!  These are images I have “borrowed” from the internet!!

Day-glow…uhh…no no.





Sometimes Day-Glo works…and well, in this case it does NOT.  Day-glo dresses, I say bring it on.  It looks really cool in certain lighting.  Also, this particular style of dress doesn’t work with the model.  Remember to dress for your body type.  Perhaps a baby doll dress would work better for fuller figured ladies.

The “cupless” bra:





I’m sorry, but any woman who tries to “sell” you a lapdance, and has on one of these bras and does NOT take off the bra, just seems a bit lazy to me.  I can understand that: Your breasts are already exposed, so why remove the bra? Come on now!  It just looks a little strange to me.

A lace turtleneck from Urban Outfitters is NOT LINGERIE!

So imagine this.  Yes.  This VERY turtleneck, but without the pants, red shirt, and a WHITE bra underneath.  What can I say?  Maybe the girl was coming from her day job and was in a bind…but on the other hand I’ve seen this outfit on her before, and I do not understand WHY she’s wearing it, because it doesn’t cover her ass…and the white bra looks more like a mistake, than a fashion statement.  I am not writing this to be mean to turtleneck girl (even though she’s not very nice to me)…I’m just saying that just because something looks nice with pants when you’re out shopping with your friends, it may not transfer well to a gentlemen’s club lingerie night-especially with the white bra AND the mistmatched underwear.  I’m just trying to help.

THIS is the perfect look for lingerie night:

Bra, panties, thigh highs.

Throw on a silky robe and you’re good to go.  Simple classy and successful.

The Easy Electronic Way to Quit Smoking!-E-Cigarettes…

Just wanted to send a shout out to Greg from .  These e-cigarettes are AMAZING.  I’ve cut down on my smoking tremendously….yes it’s baby steps, but now down to a half pack, rather than a pack a day….that’s something pretty cool my friends.

I’m still getting a nic fix, saving money by smoking the e-cigs-In New York City, a real pack is $12.00!  A starter kit is a great investment and you can check out all of the cool ones available at ElixirLiquid!  Not to mention another snow storm is heading into Manhattan and I don’t have to leave my apartment to smoke.

That’s it for tonight my friends…I’m gonna throw back a shot of Dream Water and knock myself out.

Need Help to cut back on smoking?! Drum Roll Please….Welcome!!!

We’ve all gotta have our vices right?

I would like to thank Sal Governale for turning me onto the magical totally awesome world of electronic cigarettes, by putting me in touch with ELIXIR LIQUID

Who wants to go outside and smoke in the freezing cold? NOT ME.  With e-cigarettes you can enjoy a hit of nicotine without leaving the comfort of your warm abode.  It’s also a great thing to use if you’re wanting to cut back on smoking, after taking a few puffs on my Ego Excalibur,

I tried to smoke a real cigarette and it wasn’t the same.  I didn’t get the same “high”, and I was outside in the freezing cold.  With e-cig’s, you can smoke them just about anywhere.

Even better, you can get “flavors” for your e-cig’s.  Ranging from Marlboro to double chocolate donut, I can curb my smoking habit AND chocolate binging habit all at the same time.

I’ll be posting videos soon and pics.  If you have any questions about these e-cigs, don’t hesitate to get in touch with me, or .  Just tell them Randi Newton sent ya!

I feel so retro…I’m “smoking” in bed…and since it’s an e-cig there’s no chance of falling asleep with a lit cigarette and burning down the house.

Ahh glamour…

The Train Wreck I Forever Love to Watch: The Bachelor…

The Bachelor has been on for a million years now…(or it at least seems that way).  I will NEVER get enough of this crap, and every season they always say it’s the most “controversial” one ever!


I’m assuming that A LOT of people affliated with the show this season must be hard up right now.  Why, you may ask?  I will explain:
They brought Brad back after he dumped TWO girls at the final rose ceremony costing them all public humiliation and most likely hundreds of thousands of dollars in therapy.
Nothing has EVER been the same for Brad since and “everything came crashing down like a ton of bricks.” Aww…poor Brad.
SEAL made an appearance on the show.  Forever letting Brad and his date taint “Kiss From a Rose”, which brought the girl to tears reminding her of her dead father.
“I apologize Mr. Seal…I apologize.” after butchering the song.
“I’m so sorry.  How did you handle that?”-a robotic emotionless response to his date explaining her fathers brain anersym.  I think Brad has botox ALL over his face.  He never shows any true emotion.  He’s like a Stepford Wife, but a guy.
“I like you a lot…a lot…I mean A LOT…and your daughter…I love it!” he says this to the sweet girl who tells him that her fiance died in a plane crash and that she found out a week after that she was preggo.  The REALLY messed up thing about their date, was that Brad (well..the PRODUCERS of the show in reality) whisked her off on a private mini jet-plane for a wine tasting.
I wonder if he ever apologized for taking her on a plane ride for the date?

Then Madison, a”model” (who really just looks like a stripper with fangs-she wears fake ones) eliminated herself from the show after walking out of the rose ceremony.

Next week someone gets a black eye on the show.  I can’t wait!



Miss Nebraska WINS Miss America!!! My Apologies for the Lack of Commentary This Year on The Pageant!


So for the first time in YEARS, and I mean YEARS I completely and totally space out on the fact that Miss America is on.  I go to a birthday party and come home and see all of this “Yay Nebraska!” stuff on Facebook, and low and behold Miss Nebraska has FINALLY won Miss America!  I didn’t even Tivo it…DAMN.

Teresa Scanlan is the youngest Miss America EVER, at age 17, and the first one from the state of Nebraska.  Also, I will openly say that I think she’s one of the cutest little things ever, and one of the more attractive competitors to come out of the state (I can say so because I am from there).  Here’s a link to her blog.

I wish Teresa the best of luck!  You go girl!  Now here’s where it gets tricky…this is the part where the 1st runner up takes over for Miss Nebraska, since she’s now Miss America.  Does that girl get all of the cool prizes that Teresa got?  Does she get a cool press conference and party?  I hope so.  Does it mean that since she automatically got “bumped up” to Miss Nebraska since Teresa won Miss America, that she cannot compete again unless it’s in another state? (all of you pageant girls know where I’m going with this.)

Perhaps if I were from a more pageant savvy state such as Texas or etc, I’d have a better idea, but alas I do not.  Yay Teresa!  The odds of you becoming a stripper have been drastically reduced.


What’s Your Sign? Dealing with the latest uproar about the new sign…

It’s been a HUGE press day for astrologers.  There’s a brand new sign called “Ophiuchus” and according to many sources, this new sign only applies to infants and kids under a year old.

Upon hearing about this 13th Zodiac Sign, I promptly googled guru Susan Miller of ASTROLOGYZONE. Let me tell you kids…this woman’s advice is on point.  I’m not super huge into this crap, but I’ll take a gander at certain dates that she gives on her site, and she’s usually pretty spot on.

THIS is her take on the new sign.

So with her advice, I’m staying a Virgo.  It’s like…I’m almost 30 years old, I’m not going to change my sign NOW.  

I have heard that this new sign DOES apply to infants and kids under one year old.  So, sorry parents, you can raise your kids according to the new zodiac.

This is really going to put a lot of confusion and a whole new answer to the typical pick up line in bars, “So what’s your sign?”

This looks more like a death metal band cd cover than a sign.

Should YOU do The Blueprint Cleanse?


I’ve been asked a lot of questions lately about my feelings and thoughts about The Blueprint Cleanse.  I’m not sure if the people asking have read my blog…so I’m posting this entry to say that YES.  The Blueprint Cleanse WORKS…IF YOU FOLLOW IT PROPERLY.

Did it work for me?  Ummm…..not really.  But that’s not their fault it’s my fault. I’m one of those people who LOVE to eat.  If you can muster up the willpower to do the cleanse and you do like solid foods, I would highly recommend their Juice Til’ Dinner option.  Fresh Juice, with raw food meals and snacks that are SPORADICALLY spread throughout the day.  IT WORKS.  However, I admittedly ate chocolate and snuck in various other “no no’s” during the cleanse.  So I don’t believe I made or got the most out of it.  If you do partake in alcoholic bev’s-opt for CLEAR ones-ie; vodka with soda water-and liquors-no no to beer, wine (even red on the cleanse) and champagne.

Also, it’s a good jump start to a weight loss program, I’m not recommending it AS a weight loss situation.  It’s also great after a December of pigging out, to give your body a break.

I wish I could create a diet based around coffee, chocolate and peanut butter, but I do not think that is a healthy or realistic option.

“So…what is the Randi Newton diet plan?” you may be asking yourself.  I’m working with my nutricionialist/gyrotonic trainer to figure that out exactly…but sadly it’s NOT going to involve the MASSIVE quantities of candy and bread, that it has been.

Once again, disastrously yours happy and healthy in the New Year!

Randi Newton

For your listening pleasure:

Digitally Disastrous…

Just when I’m thinking I’m forging a step on a new path, I take a test on Vizibilty and I was thrilled to see that I’m pretty…well “visible” on the net, but not in exactly the way I thought I’d be…then again, I’m really not surprised.  This picture pops up on google images when you type in my name:





Good LORD I look AWFUL!!!

This is what I look like now…





How come google can’t have THAT pic up?

Anyways I took the “vizibility” test on their site, and it came up that I was “Digitally Disastrous”-basically saying that even though I have a pretty solid “online presence” and I DO get a lot of hits on this blog, that it’s not really representative of what I’m ALL about.  It shows me a little more superficial than I actually am.  Maybe superficial isn’t the exact word…maybe “one dimensional”…God knows I haven’t donned a stripper gown for a few years now….

Today I am relaxing during the second “major snowstorm” New York City has had this year.  I refuse to go outside.  I’ve heard it’s not THAT bad, but after being labeled “digitally disastrous”, I don’t know if I want to leave the warmth of my apartment until I have a cooler image…(laugh out loud).

Disastrously and Always Yours,

Randi Newton