I know what you’re thinking, and I’ll admit it. I HAVE fallen prey to the coffee monopoly known as Starbucks. It’s convenient and I’d frequent a local mom and pop shop if any of them were still open in my hood, but thanks to the Sbux, they have been run out of business.
Starbucks is good for EVERYTHING. Like meeting someone on a blind date (well…that one time it didn’t go well, but you get the point), the time I interviewed to be a dominatrix-YEARS ago (I got that job! Woo hoo!), for a brief meeting with my fab lit agent Mark McVeigh last week
…and apparently green card negotiation meetings as well. I was meeting my new writing buddy Jon for a pow wow…as soon as I sat down he texted me and told me to listen to the conversation behind us.
“Are you looking for a friend or a boyfriend type situation along with this?” an older man with a fold up bike was talking to an Asian woman. “I can teach you how to cut hair, and you can teach me Chinese, I’ve always wanted to learn Chinese.”
“Oh yes I would love to cut hair.” he handed her a card, that appeared to be for a dog grooming business company…so maybe she’d become a hairdresser for pets? I wasn’t quite sure….Jon and I started our own conversation, despite the fact that we both really wanted to eavesdrop on this negotiation process happening behind us. We did manage to catch a few snippets from their conversation though like:
“Oh yes, children come before dogs, they always come before dogs!” Well…that’s good to know, and the woman mentioned having a husband who seems to be cool with her marrying someone else for this green card. Then my favorite, “I can’t wait to learn Chinese! Should we do a coffee or lunch again? Maybe email to get to know a little more about each other?” The man stood up and scooped up his bike and we watched them leave Sbux and shake hands outside. A romance is born!
I was telling my barista about what I had just witnessed.
“Girl, all kinds of shadiness happens at Starbucks.” She didn’t elaborate, but I can only imagine. If I had a job interview there to be a dominatrix at one point, and now this green card stuff…it’s gotta be a good meeting place for all kinds of things. As we chatted, I said, “Here’s that water you love so much.” and discreetly slipped her a half-pint of Smirnoff in exchange for my 8 shot latte.