Yes I am on an internet dating website. I’m on a few to be exact, and I have been for quite some time. Originally when I signed up for it I had high expectations. I am canceling my membership when it expires at the end of this month because I’ve had more bad luck than good. Does this mean I am giving up on dating? No it does not. It does mean that I will no longer be blindly meeting my cyber friends in hoping for something more.
I would like to give the men who have contacted me some advice to maybe better help them succeed in their future dating endeavors. These men have no idea that I have a blog, so who knows if they’ll even read this…but it can hopefully help anyone out who’s an avid internet dater.
If you email someone and you don’t hear back from them, cut your losses. Don’t pine away. It’s not a good idea to send an email like this, especially if more than two weeks has gone by.
I’m disappointed I haven’t heard back from you… but such is the online dating world…
One thing I’ve learned in this life is that everyone is entitled to change their mind… so I hope maybe you change it back and I get the chance to meet you in person.
It also seemed like a form letter…like he may have sent it to some other people too.
Is it wrong that if I’m not interested in someone that I do not write back to them at all? I don’t think so. I feel that it’s much more polite than saying, “Hey I’m not interested in you…sorry.”
In addition to the message above, the same guy contacted me on another site I was on TODAY (it’s been over a week since he sent the other one) and said:
“We really must stop meeting like this…”
If he contacts me again I will most likely have to come right out and say I am not interested. I wish people would get the hint. I’ve been on that side plenty of times…but I know the signals by now.
I had one guy who sent me a friendly email, immediately requesting that I call him on the phone.
I believe in corresponding a few times with someone online before I’m comfortable chatting with them offline. Thanks to modern technology and Facebook, texting, etc…this may sound awful..but I really have turned into someone who doesn’t love talking on the phone. I waited ONE day before making my move and just as I was about ready to email him back, he sent me a message:
“Did you want to chat offline or not???”
Umm…thanks for giving me the chance to get back to you. When someone is that pushy right off the bat I take it as a sign of things to come in the future. I did not respond. Also, he seemed to have an unhealthy obsession with his dog according to his profile. VERY unhealthy.
If you have a username such as “MEHULKWILLCRUSHTHINGS”, “BLOODNGUTZ”, or “MASSIVEDSTRUCION” sorry…I do not think I will contact you back and I may be a little wary of why you’ve decided to call yourself that. If you look sad or angry in your pics and have illustrations of skulls and blood in your profile as well, I’m probably not getting back to you.
On one guy’s proflie it said:
What’s the most secretive thing you’re willing to say here:
Uh…wow…that’s jumping the gun a bit. Although I do admire someone with a sense of humor…you never know how a stranger may interpret things.
You can think I’m a bitch if you want. I don’t care. Maybe I’m too picky, but I do feel that the Internet dating websites can be a “forced” way of looking for love. That’s the experience I’ve had with it anyways. In the past I’ve either met people that range from one extreme to the other: The man who constantly talks about marriage on the first (and last) date, or the guy who tries to be all suave and makes it clear that he wants nothing but a random hook up and gets angry when I don’t get wasted and I leave after a few drinks.
Also…if you are ever running late for a date, like REALLY REALLY late…CALL or text! It takes less than five minutes to do so. I’ll let it slide the first time…the next time…maybe I won’t.